Dating

[Friendly Hostile]

Because sometimes you and the other person are just looking for some fun or company for a bit?

[JrDude]

That's correct; why would/should I date for another reason?

Either for FH's reason, or just because you want to for whatever reason, and then let the feelings build up into love.

[L10]

Call me a hipacrit(I can't seem to spell that right) but I agree with HorribleToad

[Mystic]

So you'd only date a girl if you were in love?

Love usually doesn't happen prior to dating. Anyways, I see no point in dating someone if you don't have feeling for them. Personally, I believe sex is pointless without love. But if you really want sex, why use someone? Why not find someone who doesn't give a poop and just say you wanna intercourse ? Rather than dating and hurting someone.

[The Riddler]

I absolutely agree. I hate it so much when guys just try to get with girls for sex/physical pleasure and they don't really love them for who they are. If you don't, then why are you with her? Guys should wait as long as they have to before going for a girl so that they make the right couple.

Though it may be unintentional, you're stereotyping guys here as the perpetrators.
My second major relationship, I was in love with the girl, she was in love with the sex. I didn't find out she had no feelings for me until after we broke up, she was in it solely for the sex.


Now, sex isn't a bad thing. The reason behind each person doing it though should be mutual.
If both people are doing it out of love, than it's good.
If both people are doing it out of lust, it's fine.
If one is for love, the other is for lust, then it leads to hurt and is bad.

[Chrona]

...I havn't dated anyone..it's a scary thought to me..

[RX-78-2]

Because sometimes you and the other person are just looking for some fun or company for a bit?

In my opinion this is just friendship. Couldn't friendship be just as good in this case, except without the lovemaking (of any kind--kissing included) and commitment? This is assuming that both people have the same feelings (in type and intensity) for each other.

Either for FH's reason, or just because you want to for whatever reason, and then let the feelings build up into love.

I've thought about this, but decided against it. Quite honestly, I'm very scared of a girl that I'm not interested in asking me out; I'd be put in a very awkward situation, as I'm currently looking into a certain someone.

Love usually doesn't happen prior to dating. Anyways, I see no point in dating someone if you don't have feeling for them. Personally, I believe sex is pointless without love. But if you really want sex, why use someone? Why not find someone who doesn't give a poop and just say you wanna intercourse ? Rather than dating and hurting someone.

I agree. If I understand correctly, you're saying that people should have feelings for each other (as in, love) before dating, but that it usually doesn't happen this way--is that correct? I'm just double-checking.

Though it may be unintentional, you're stereotyping guys here as the perpetrators.
My second major relationship, I was in love with the girl, she was in love with the sex. I didn't find out she had no feelings for me until after we broke up, she was in it solely for the sex.
Now, sex isn't a bad thing. The reason behind each person doing it though should be mutual.
If both people are doing it out of love, than it's good.
If both people are doing it out of lust, it's fine.
If one is for love, the other is for lust, then it leads to hurt and is bad.

I agree, but I wasn't stereotyping guys. I didn't specify an amount of guys that I thought would engage in that type of activity. I was just saying that I hate it when any guy does that, although girls can do it too. Personally, I think that guys do it more though. That might be a stereotype, although it's also an opinion.

Call me a hipacrit(I can't seem to spell that right) but I agree with HorribleToad

Thank you. Also, just so you don't have to look it up (in case you didn't already), it's spelled: "hypocrite."

...I havn't dated anyone..it's a scary thought to me..

It's very scary to me too, I must say. :|

_{Whoa, 6 different quotes in one post... that's like a new personal best}

[JrDude]

I've thought about this, but decided against it. Quite honestly, I'm very scared of a girl that I'm not interested in asking me out; I'd be put in a very awkward situation, as I'm currently looking into a certain someone.

Not interested? It could be because she's hot/pretty/HAS GIANT TITS, and you hope you can build love up, or maybe you're friends with the girl, not officially in love, sound like a pretty good reason to go out to me.

[Friendly Hostile]

In my opinion this is just friendship. Couldn't friendship be just as good in this case, except without the lovemaking (of any kind--kissing included) and commitment?

Because there's certain things you can't and won't do with friends or that they simply can't or won't provide.  My point is, you don't have to commit to someone for life to be in a relationship with them.  Sometimes it's simply because you're both looking for someone in the short term.  Or simply someone to have fun with, which there's nothing wrong with if you're safe about it.  This once again goes back to people putting sex on way too high a pedestal.  You shouldn't sleep with anyone and everyone, but you don't have to spend the rest of your life with them either.  Life's short, so you might as well enjoy it and have people to enjoy it with.

[Mystic]

I agree. If I understand correctly, you're saying that people should have feelings for each other (as in, love) before dating, but that it usually doesn't happen this way--is that correct? I'm just double-checking.

I was saying two things. One, love usually doesn't happen before dating. That was in response to the idea of dating someone because you love them. Typically, love develops while dating.

[Nayrman]

...I havn't dated anyone..it's a scary thought to me..

It's appropriate your name is Chrona... as I feel like going into the Smith Corner every time I read this thread.

[RX-78-2]

Not interested? It could be because she's hot/pretty/HAS GIANT TITS, and you hope you can build love up, or maybe you're friends with the girl, not officially in love, sound like a pretty good reason to go out to me.

By "not interested in," I mean "not attractive" and/or "not my type." It's just too bad that some girls are only one of those things (as in: only attractive or only my type). I just want the best possible relationship, so I'm trying to get with this one girl that I really like for many reasons.

Because there's certain things you can't and won't do with friends or that they simply can't or won't provide.  My point is, you don't have to commit to someone for life to be in a relationship with them.  Sometimes it's simply because you're both looking for someone in the short term.  Or simply someone to have fun with, which there's nothing wrong with if you're safe about it.  This once again goes back to people putting sex on way too high a pedestal.  You shouldn't sleep with anyone and everyone, but you don't have to spend the rest of your life with them either.  Life's short, so you might as well enjoy it and have people to enjoy it with.

In short _{(did I say that before?)}, I agree. I'm not talking about sex though, just so you know. But yes, I agree that if it's safe and mutual, it's fine to go out with people like that. I think that the key point there is the feeling of understanding between the couple, as in: why they're together and such. I'd just feel awkward being with someone like that when I'd know that there's a better girl out there for me (even if she's more difficult to ask out).

I was saying two things. One, love usually doesn't happen before dating. That was in response to the idea of dating someone because you love them. Typically, love develops while dating.

Thank you.

[JrDude]

Thank you.

Thank you? I think you need to re-read what you said, and what he said; he's disagreeing with you.
This isn't a movie where you will meet the perfect person, fall in love, have sex and date, in reality love (usually) happens while you're dating the person and rarely before.

[Chrona]

It's appropriate your name is Chrona... as I feel like going into the Smith Corner every time I read this thread.

..They all went in the corner because of the poem...even the blue scary guy..

[Friendly Hostile]

I'd know that there's a better girl out there for me (even if she's more difficult to ask out)

If you know she's out there, why the intercourse  are you waiting around?  If you're meant to be together, no point in waiting for them.

It's because you don't know that there is someone better out there.  This isn't guaranteed.  There isn't always some happy ending.  There is nothing to say that you will find the right person.  Which is why I see nothing wrong with various short term and/or multiple long term relationships occurring before you potentially meet this supposed right person.  Have fun and enjoy the company of people.  If they don't work out in the end, move on and find someone else you enjoy spending time with.  You exist for such a short time on this planet, and there is no reason to waste half of it looking for something that might not be there at all.