BFB's Bad Advice for Young People

[BOREDFOREVER]

This is Boredfanboy's Bad advice for young people.

The advice in this thread should never be followed by anyone, ever.

Here's how it works:  You give me a problem or dilemma, I'll give you advice.

Your problem can be real or imagined.  I will answer each and every post, even if posted by TK.

Let us begin.

[Kilroy]

I like where this thread will be going.

Expect something from me later.

[Thirdkoopa]

even if posted by TK.

k before I start anywhere else:

Why did you specifically single me out?

[spoiler]I know the actual answer but I just want to see what you say as bad advice[/spoiler]

edit: Oh yeah and why do people believe in religion?

This thread is going to be awesome just like the one before.

[The Riddler]

What is the best way to manscape?

[Silverhawk79]

How should I go about applying for jobs?
[spoiler]
even though I just got one and plan to stick with it
[/spoiler]

[JrDude]

how does i get laid¿

[Magnum]

I just got a job at a Mexican food restaurant. Lets make this interesting.

How is a good way to get fired from said job?

[Macawmoses]

God I loved the original.

How do I be a good administrator?

[Red]

If the "original" one is the one on hadaway, I loved it. <3

How can I become President of the US?

[Thirdkoopa]

How do I be a good administrator?

I can answer this one without even having to try.

Be more like Rudo, Kenny, Metroid_Fan!, Andrea, Snorkel, Ret, EJ, Ben, and more. Use those as your highest influences. The more people say "You're becoming worse each and every day" Take those words as them not really wanting to tell you that due to your greatness. When anyone tries to bash you remember to point fingers at other staff members. You're only allowed in the CP if you can break something or someone forces you to do something, then talk about how amazing it and difficult it was. Try to get as much money as possible out of it and only lock things out of emotion. Hire people due to being your friends and start drama in a psuedo way daily. Every time you do something like any of those so called "Good" Administrators did good much like Vaatix and Shy you knew before begin to slap yourself with a fish. Make sure the Fish has staples and herpes too to start off with so you can feel the pain. Be as inactive as possible but not enough to have people hate you so when you log in people will just be happy that you're an active staff member. On top of that, ninny at your community daily and make them feel like poop so they'll know that they're idiots from it. Try to force a merge every month or a server move. Split your community as much as possible to have their own cliche's. Make events that sound great but never finish. Betray people (Most notably staff members) because it's dark and edgy and pretend not to give a poop so you can look like you're in the cool crowd. Remember, causing as much staff fights without you involved = Cool. Having no hope or unity in anything you do is also cool, but enough hope to still be on the site in the first place. Be sure to do that in a slow way to the point where nobody will truly know it's you. In the end it's all fun!  When your community asks "Where have you been?" Remember to always say "Oh, I was busy having a life unlike you guys" - Just note that in the end it'll make them suck less. Embed Jonas Brothers music on the site and never try at anything you do. Break the server every week.  And don't forget to rape cats then come on here only to talk about it.

Finally ignore your community as much as possible. They'll love it.

[Macawmoses]

How do I get Boredfanboy to answer my queries and not TK?

[Thirdkoopa]

How do I get Boredfanboy to answer my queries and not TK?

There's only one way to. Once you start with him you never finish. He's intercourse ing EVERYWHERE. You CAN'T RUN. HE CAN'T EVEN RUN FROM HIMSELF.

* Thirdkoopa stabs himself in the heart with a dagger

It was the only way. Nothing of value is lost.

[Kayo]

This is Biredfanboy's Bad advice for young people.

Why did you spell your name wrong? .-.

[BOREDFOREVER]

k before I start anywhere else:

Why did you specifically single me out?

Hints:  You can't take them.

edit: Oh yeah and why do people believe in religion?

This thread is going to be awesome just like the one before.

Religion:  Reason 1# Oogba is better hunter.

OOgba and some Steve were hunters.  OOgba was a man, and he intercourse ing rocked and hunting.  He'd kill a wooly mammoth just for poops and giggles.  Steve sucked at it, but was too much of a ninny to admit it, and assumed OOgba had some kind of special powers.  He watched him one day, and OOgba rubbed some mammoth poop on his face.  Steve assumed they were markings to honor some unknown being, so he went out and rubbed some poop on his face too.  OOgba did it so that he's blend into the woods.  Steve's eyes fell out due to the poop he rubbed in them being all over zealous.  So Steve decided that some god had done this to him, and told other stupid people that god had made him special.  They believed him, and started worshiping "Mammoth Shit God."  They all died because they rubbed poop in their eyes and were eaten by tigers.

Religion: Reason 2 #  Bruce get's laid.

So all the villagers were watching Bruce.  He was getting all kinds of tail.  Every chick in the camp was dropping her tiger skin for him.  All the little village guys who couldn't get laid saw this, and couldn't figure it out.  So they assumed Bruce had some special powers, and started bowing down to him.  Bruce didn't know what the intercourse  they were doing, but they were seriously getting all up in his poop while he was hunting and intercourse ing.  So finally he was like "Go get me some beer," just so they'd go away for a little while, and beer was really hard to come buy in 70,000 BC.  But they took it as a god demanding sacrifice, and I'll be darned if they didn't find him some primative beer.  When they gave him the beer, he took pity on them, and told one of the uglier ninnyes to go give the virgins a piece.  She did, and they continued to bring Bruce beer, even though he just started ignoring them instead.

There are other reasons, but those are two big ones.

What is the best way to manscape?

What the intercourse ?  I googled "manscape," and found a link on lonelyvirgin.net explaining what the hell you were talking about.  Apparently, some guys think that they need to keep their pubes trimmed because women will find it more attractive.  This makes no sense.  If you've gotten a chick far enough that she's taken a look at the joystick, do you honestly think she's gonna give a intercourse  how long your intercourse ing pubes are?  The only reason I could imagine you would do this is that you want to make something like an arrow, showing a girl exactly where the party is.  In that case, by a beard trimmer and good razor specifically for that purpose.

How should I go about applying for jobs?

You look around and find the place that you;ld like to work.  Go in their and find out who the top man is.  Come back later with a bottle of good scotch and a whore.  Walk into the office, set the whore in his lap, and pour two glasses of scotch.  Ask him when you start.  If the guy says that he doesn't like scotch or prefers wine, get up and walk out.  You don't want to work for a ninny.

However, if by some weird twist of fate a woman manages to be in charge, forget the scotch and whore.  Go in, and lay it out on the desk.  She'll be taken aback, but hold eye-contact.  If she reaches for it, smack her hand back.  Then say "You wanna be close to this all the time?"
HIRED

And wear something decent.  A polo or suit.  Don't wander in wearing shorts and a shirt with an eightball on it.



I'll answer more later.

[Silverhawk79]

Don't wander in wearing shorts and a shirt with an eightball on it.

Oh, right. Forgot about that.
<_<