BFB's Bad Advice for Young People

[BOREDFOREVER]

Why is your advice so good?

It's fueled by liquor and awesome.

Why do you kick ass, Bored?

I'm fueled by liquor and awesome.

I can see what you meant by "bad advice." That was the most horrible piece of poop suggestion I've ever seen. *time for new serious question*

Was that intentional?

You need a good dose of liquor and awesome.  Also to go to a thread that's easier to understand.  I found one for you, but at another forum:

TWEEN FORUM JOKE THREAD

Have fun.

If I'm trying to prove my insanity online, how should I go about it?

How should I get you to respond to one of my questions?

I answer questions in order of receipt, and I answer all questions. Except for this one, which I'm answering out of order.
Now, to your question-

People think insanity online is about being random.  They think "Oh, I'll post something about eating purple and flying on waffles that makes no sense, and people will crack up and think I'm crazy."  Please, for intercourse s sake, stop it.  And if one of you dumb motherintercourse ers calls this absurdism one more time I'm gonna shove a Beckett play so far down your throat you'll poop French translated into English for the rest of your life.

Anywho, internet insanity is tough, because it's easy to fake things.  What you've got to do is 1)Establish yourself on the forum with a vidoe where you directly adress members.  Then, find a local newstation were they don't use a tape delay.  If you can, find one with a male anchor and a female anchor.  Set a VCR or DVR to record the news.  Break into the studio during the newscast, and run up between the anchors.  Take your javelin and shotputs out and set them on the MALE anchors shoulder.  Ask him "I just polished these up, do you think she'll like them?" and gesture to the female anchor.

If your not looking to do time for sexual assault, your just not crazy enough.  If you can't find a tv station without time delay, consider doing this.  Find the name and adress of some people on the forum.  Go to their homes around the time they usually post.  Take a device with you that you can post on the forum with.  Post something, and wait for their response.  When they do, write a response on a small sheet of paper.  Wrap the paper around a rock and throw it through their window.  Run like hell.

[Shujinco2]

Should I drop out of school?

[Silverhawk79]

Find the name and adress of some people on the forum.  Go to their homes around the time they usually post.  Take a device with you that you can post on the forum with.  Post something, and wait for their response.  When they do, write a response on a small sheet of paper.  Wrap the paper around a rock and throw it through their window.  Run like hell.

HMMM I WONDER WHO I LIVE CLOSE ENOUGH TO DO THIS TO
GEE, I DUNNO

[Kayo]

You need a good dose of liquor and awesome.  Also to go to a thread that's easier to understand.  I found one for you, but at another forum:

TWEEN FORUM JOKE THREAD

Have fun.

That is seriously, the worst intercourse ing forum I've ever seen.

Question. How did you find this poop? D:

[The Riddler]

Ok. Serious question. I hit a guy with my car. He died. I put him in my trunk and I don't know what to do with him.

WHAT DO I DO?!

[Macawmoses]

What starter pokemon should I pick in Pokemon Yellow?

[BOREDFOREVER]

Should I drop out of school?

Fuck no.  Highschool is the best place to get hunting practice.  And besides, you have to finish highschool to get to college.  College is where the vagina-y springs like wildflowers.  The girls are there to give it up to other students.  Why would you want to miss out on that?  And don't think that you can just go to college parties as a highschool dropout.  That guy gets none.  There's an aura that surronds him like Pigpen from penuts that girls won't even go near.

UNLESS you are a drug dealer or in a successful band.  Both of these vocations will gain you as much access to female flesh as college.

[BOREDFOREVER]

That is seriously, the worst intercourse ing forum I've ever seen.

Question. How did you find this poop? D:

Well, first I went to my local library.  I didn't want to start on the computer: too obvious.  I went to the reference section and found an oddly placed cookbook.  I opened it, and a small peice of paper fell out.  It had a series of numbers and the phrase "Jack knew not what the men would do."  The phrase is from a rare book self-published by a man called Juice.  Juice was dead, and only a handful of copies of his book, "The Juice is Loose" exist.  I went down to the city bottoms, to an old repair shop.  I went to the back door and knocked three times.  A cross eyed man let me in.  I asked him which I was the good eye.  He told me the one that comes after a toast.  I went down a dark hall to the last door.  Inside was a man behind a desk with one short leg being shimmed up with the copy of the book I was looking for.  I told him I needed the book.   He refused.  I choked him to death.  I opened the book and looked for the third word on each page denoted in the numerical sequence on the piece of paper.  The words made no sense.  I thought I had hit a dead end until I noticed an appendix.  The numbers corresponded to an entry denoting a small village in South Africa.  I got on a plane.  The dame next to me had legs so long I could write a novel up her shins.  She declined my offer to do so.  I got off and took a rickety cab to the village.  The driver dropped me off two miles out, and I had to walk the rest of the way in.  I found the biggest abode in the village and showed the man inside the peice of paper.  He took a long swig out of an old bottle.  I waited.  He fell foward onto the desk.  Poison, suicide where the truth dies with the vessel.  Two men with automatics came in the door behind me.  The told me that no one ever finished the journey I was on.  I told them to honor me with a drink before filling me full of holes.  They obliged, and I served them straight from the bottle.  I took one of their guns as they fell to the floor, and squezzed off a few rounds.  I then began going through the house, looking for a clue.  I bent over to look in a drawer.  When I tried to rise, I cold feel cold steel pressing into the back of my neck.  The driver hadn't fallen for my ruse.  He turned me around and punched me in the mouth.  I fell.  He rested the muzzle of the gun on the bridge of my nose and asked me what I wanted to do before I died.  I said that there was nothing I was going to do from my current position.  He laughed.  Then I  -

OH WAIT.  I JUST WENT ONTO GOOGLE, TYPED KIDS FORUM, AND CLICKED ON ONE OF THE FIRST I SAW.

Ok. Serious question. I hit a guy with my car. He died. I put him in my trunk and I don't know what to do with him.

WHAT DO I DO?!

Fuck.  This is a couple of days old now.  God knows that car is gotta be intercourse ing stinking by now.  Listen, you gotta put that poop in a river.  Or, take advantage of the situation.  Pick someone you hate.  Drive the car to thier house and park it on the street or around back.  Call the cops and report it missing.  When they ask you for details, say you haven't seen it in a few days, but you did see some person taking a long hard look at it and bragging about their most recent score.  Make sure you give the date it went missing as a day before you hit the guy.  They'll get charged with the theft and the murder. 

What starter pokemon should I pick in Pokemon Yellow?

I don't know.  I did some research (drink heavily)  and this is all I came up with:



What the intercourse  is she doing?  This is the best pic I've seen all day.  She looks like some emo kid who got the shaft at the costume shop and decided it was the best intercourse ing thing she's ever seen.  Look, I found even more depressing ones:



How do you increase the lonely desparation that goes along with pokemon cosplay?  Make it fit in with the intercourse ing Ren Fest.  Maybe Sir Eatsalot with come save the maiden Pikachu.  Also, what the intercourse  is up with her giant face?



Oh poop!  Rain from the art club decided to to a performance peice on her love of Pokemon!  She's going to do an interpretive dance to the Pokemon Yellow theme music!  Good news, boys, she's not taken,. and she claims she might be bi! All you gotta do to get a peice is listen to her talk about her Nuzlock run for five hours while she holds that chubby doll in front of her.  I think the leg warmers are a nice touch.  It's like a subtle reminder that she's intercourse ing stupid.

[Night the Lucario]

I'm bored nigh unto death, BFB, what should I do?

[Java]

What should I do now that Summer vacation is here and I'm out of school?

[jnfs2014]

How I become friends with high school girls? (not serious)

[SkyMyl]

How do I kill someone's love interest without them knowing it's me?

[Macawmoses]

If I catch a female masturbating, what do I do?

[Thirdkoopa]

Where's the exit?

[SkyMyl]

If I catch a female masturbating, what do I do?

Isn't the answer to this question incredibly obvious?