Okay, a simple game I created while I was asleep. This is essentially a +1 thread with a limit, though knowing how awesome my ideas are, and how you treat my Game Corner threads, this will probably last for two pages before it's abandoned. *coughThere's a road aheadcoughNothingnesscough*
So, the premise? Write an epic story, consisting of memes. Yes, abuse as many memes, tropes, and cliches as possible to create a story as awesome as possible. Integrate them as subtly as you can, or just outright have absurd things such as the Kool-Aid man bursting through a wall occur for no reason. Hell, you can even pull something similar to Kilroy's "Adventures with Gregg Casey" and throw random poop in, as long as you don't
overdo it. In which case, I'll pull out my retcon gun and erase it from the plot.
The posts can be as long or as short as you want, so long as you don't Godmode anything.
The catch? This thread ends when we reach 300 285 posts. For those of you who have the default, 15 posts per page setting on, that's 20 pages to start and end a story. For those who don't have the default setting on, just look at the top of the posts until you see "Reply #285", and stop going on with the story. And yes, EVERY POST IN THIS THREAD COUNTS TOWARDS COMPLETION, even if it's irrelevant. Just go with the flow and continue the story, kind of like those old "Five word story" threads all over message boards since 200#.Will we start and conclude a story? Or will we end on a cliffhanger? Hell, I don't know. Let's see how it ends. The story begins NOW. And, as a treat, I'll start you all off somewhere. Though, this is also an example of how absurd, memetastic, cliched, and reference(y) the villains are. So, try not to take any of this seriously, have fun, and don't overdo it. And be creative with your references, if you have any.
...and you better not abandon this.
(http://physicalpariah.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/ringwraith.jpg)
"Yes...after an unknown amount of time, I, Damon Villain, am finally able to finish my MASTER PLAN! The pieces are in place...the pawns are locked in position...this game of chess can finally end, after all these years. I, DAMON VILLAIN, SHALL (You guessed it) TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!"
(http://pagesperso-orange.fr/ccrame/Images/Spirits%20Within/Final%20Fantasy%2034.jpg)
Solder: Uh, Lord Damon?
"WHO DARES INTERRUPT THE MIGHTY DAMON VILLAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF HIS BOASTING?"
Soldier: Soldier #333, sir!
"YOU'RE FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFIRED!"
Soldier: But sir, I have a wife and eight kids!
"...eight kids?"
Soldier: Yes! This one is Jimmy, this one is Jamaica, this is Joshu-
"WHO THE FUCK NAMES A GIRL JAMAICA? THAT'S LIKE NAMING A DOG RUSHMORE!"
Soldier: A-anyway, sir...I just wanted to let you know that the intercom is on.
"...huh?"
Soldier: You never switched the intercom off after your last announcement, and everyone in the tower is able to hear you because of it.
"...son of a
ninny. How long was it on for?"
Soldier: Three hours. Everyone also heard you...in an intimate compromise with your secretaries.
"Which one."
Soldier: Secretar
ies. All seven of them.
"JESUS CHRIST, WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK"
Soldier: I'm just going to leave...now...
"FUCK THAT, YOU'RE GOING HOME!"
Soldier #8476: Sir, permission to speak fr-
(http://corndogger.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/tourettes_guy.jpg)
"YOU CAN SUCK MY DICK, OR COCK."
Soldier #276: I hope that no one has any plans to invade this tower and kill our leader.
Soldier #275: You fool! You can't do that! You'll create a time paradox!
Solder #274: You've jinxed us. I'm going to hide the hot dogs, just in case there's an intruder.
Soldier #276: This isn't Final Fantasy VIII.
Soldier #260: It may as well be. We're a unified group of soldiers working for a high authority to achieve a singular goal, carrying out the orders of our leader.
(http://www.b96hits.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/whutstole.jpg)
Soldier #255: YO #276, I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU AND IMMA LET YOU FINISH, BUT FINAL FANTASY VII IS ONE OF THE BEST GAMES OF ALL TIME.
OF ALL TIME
(To be continued...)
Meanwhile, far away on the other side of the world-
"Would you hurry up and intercourse ing decide already?"
"Sh! Deciding on the type of hero I want to be is crucial. I need to really think about it."
"Be the Chaste Hero, your naive and young enough."
"B-B-But... I want sexual intercourse."
"Then be a god darn sex magnet! Who gives a intercourse , we've only got twenty pages to fill in this paper work and get on our way."
"Uh, don't you mean minutes? Twenty minutes?"
"Huh? Oh yeah, sure."
After debating for what seemed like hours, although in the villain's world only a second seemed to pass by, our hero had decided on his characteristics.
"Check this out. Deep, soothing voice, hair like the Super Man, pecks like the Batman, and a smile that could rival the Joker's. Aren't I bad ass?"
"Stop adding 'the' in front of everything. It doesn't make you or them sound cooler."
"Au contraire, mon ami."
"What?"
"Nothing, I just wanted to show you how sexy my voice sounds in a different language!"
"So you decided on Fake Ultimate Hero, then?"
"Whatever, dude, let's go find my Mary Sue!"
And so, our heroes were off. Daniel Dion, the self-centered bastard who probably will end up making more flaws than doing good, and his sidekick, Moe. The two of them didn't know where they were heading, or why, but they knew that they wanted to get the intercourse out of that dusty old office building now that they were finished filing their paperwork. They were now officially super heroes. They're powers, you ask? Who gives a intercourse as long as they have sweet ass names that depict how bad ass they are.
"It's time for the world to meet... The Destroyer... and his trusty steed... Moe!"
Wow, mine sucks. But anyway, first contribution. I <3 Moe.
And somewhere in between this side of the world and the other laid the ever so crucial Mac Guffin. A spear said to be forged some years ago by some ancient civilization. It is said to be able to rend worlds asunder and grant its wielder ultimate power. However, one must prove his/her might to use the Mac Guffin Spear.
Definition of Mac Guffin (and probably your one single best source for all other trope-related materials)
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MacGuffin (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MacGuffin)
Screw Wikipedia, TVtropes is the only wiki you will ever need.
Meanwhile, thousands of miles away...
(http://thenullset.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/kamina_char-edit.jpg)
"Aww yeah, it's been six months since I started my journey and I feel like a total badass. So badass all I need is a single pair of pants, a cape, sunglasses, and a katana. I'm totally not an expy of any character from an Anime at all! Soon, I will find this fabled lance, and...uh...and..."
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v631/ahbeng/Blogspot/Siesta3.jpg)
Maid: Excuse me mister, but if you're going to be talking to a fern like that in public, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Lancer: Silence, woman! I am Chaste!
Maid: But your text box says clearly says Lancer!
Lancer: Does no one in this town know Monty Python? Whatever. I shall be on my way. This town does not have the information I desire. And now, I shall walk away into the sunset, gazing at it with my katana perched on my shoulders while a dramatic snippet from a song plays, whilst you all stare in astonishment. By the way, what is your name, dear maid?
Maid: Selena. Why do you ask?
Lancer: Because I need someone to travel with me, preferably a female so that I can have a woman chasing after me and my badass nature, only to shun them because I'm a Celibate Hero at heart.
Selena: No thanks, I'm just a humble maid working at a hotel, struggling with her rent. I'm not out for adventure.
Lancer: Ah, but you just told me your name. No longer are you a generic maid! You are now a female character with an identity! You have no choice but to follow me on my adventure.
Selena: Dammit, you tricked me! Well, forget it! I'm not going anywhere! I'm staying right here!
Lancer: Have it your way. We'll see each other in the future, like it or not. Now to stridefully walk into the sun like a badass. Farewell, little miss tsundere!
Selena: I am not a tsundere!
...
Selena: Damn, he's hot.
Okay, I've made my character contribution. A male badass, who is clearly inspired by a character from another series, is dangerously genre savvy, constantly breaks the fourth wall, and has a huge ego. And a maid who maid herself known. (Pun totally intended) Will she make an appearance later on? Probably not.
And off in the sunset sat a stereotypical JRPG teenage boy. (or girl?) He (she?) came from a simple town called Simplainia and little did he (she?) know that a total badass (at least to his own accord) would come and change his life.
Quote from: Dr.Hobo2 on February 22, 2010, 09:01:59 PM
And off in the sunset sat a stereotypical JRPG teenage boy. (or girl?) He (she?) came from a simple town called Simplainia and little did he (she?) know that a total badass (at least to his own accord) would come and change his life.
So we decided on a gender, then?
"My destructive senses are tingling!" the Destroyer shouted suddenly, a finger twisting into his temple and his eyes clamped shut.
"...What the intercourse are you doing?"
"Sh! Spidey - er - Destroyer senses... tingling!"
"That's called hormones, dumb ass. Go into the bathroom for a couple minutes, and come out when your ready to face the world again." Moe sat down and looked toward the port-a-potties over to their left. "And be quick about it, I haven't got all day."
The Destroyer stood there for a moment, completely unsure of what was happening. "Uh... what?"
"... Never mind..."
"Anyway, my destructive senses were telling me that something exciting is that way!" the Destroyer pointed dramatically in a random direction, his eyes looking determined and a close-up on his face (while still capturing his amazing finger wavering slightly in the wind).
"Why, is there food that way?" Moe asked, grabbing his stomach as it roared. The Destroyer jumped slightly at the sound.
"Holy intercourse , Moe. Did you eat a tiger or something for breakfast?"
"No, I was so hungry that I ate a horse. Now come on, I'd settle for half a cow I'm so starved."
And so our two heroes finally left, and went off, in search of food. Half a cow, to be precise. But they had no idea that they were walking towards an even greater reward... Yes, their search would soon become one of great peril, as they scoured the globe for the great Mac Guffin Spear...
No, I'm joking about how all JRPG teenage guys could easily pass off as girls. ;)
The town that Bridgett (the guy/girl?) lived in was a quaint, stereotypical town that any under-aged hero would start in. The few people that lived there bustled about trying their best not to be just generic NPCs. One of them was a farmer who had come to accept his inability to be important. This farmer was Bridgett's father. He one day hoped that his (her?) son (daughter?) would one day follow in his footsteps and become a farmer too and nothing, not even the most powerful warrior in the world, would make him change his mind...Well...maybe a couple thousand gold pieces would.
And suddenly, in a blink of unimportance, somewhere in a desert, a Pebble became animate. It knew that it would probably never be found or mentioned again by its creator, and might even be forgotten, but started its important work nonetheless, and began to drag itself in the sand, changing direction based on a Pattern only it knew, slowly growing as sand started to cling to it. In another mysterious fit of intelligence, a bird flying overhead looked down and asked itself, "Why is that Pebble carving Forgotten runes in the sand?"
Feel free to plot around with this as you will, I will probably forget about it.
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_qtkg2HkNmAE/SKj_q0eG87I/AAAAAAAAAEE/H0ugG_Eyb20/s320/Kamina.jpg)
Two days after Lancer's encounter with the maiden, he found himself traversing what seemed to be an endless desert, for what felt like months. Of course, his ego only translated that as a reason to kick anyone's ass. He had just encountered some sand bandits, the likes of which tried to steal his sword.
Lancer: Sand bandits aren't nearly as impressive as one would think. I mean, really? They look like mummy warriors. I'm not even sure why they tried to steal from me, when all I have are my clothes and my sword!
*GROWL*
Lancer:...I honestly should have packed some lunch before I left that village.
??????: Oh....*Pant* I never thought...it would be this good! It's...it's un-*Gasp*unbelievable!
Lancer:...no, no, it couldn't be. I mean, to find something such as that in a desert...that would be too good and far too awesome to actually happen! But then again, this is the most epic story ever told.
?????: What-what do you think? I've...never... done this before, so I'm just...*Gasp*
??????: Amazing! For your first time, this is-
Lancer: I've heard enough. I cannot stand here listening to two female individuals making love! I must fight! I must save the world! I must...I must catch a glimpse of them in the act! But where are they? I don't see anything but desert. Maybe over that large mound of sand that closely resembles a chibi mountain...
And so, our hero...apparently, climbed up a small mound of sand, which requires almost no description at all, in an attempt to catch to women loving each other's company.
?????: I'm glad to know that you find the food good. I was afraid that you wouldn't like it.
(http://cdn.myanimelist.net/images/clubs/3/59126m.jpg)
Selena: I have to give you credit, this stew is just amazing!
Lancer: Dammit, someone was playing with my Chivalrous Pervert nature! I swear they were doing it!
Selena: Who's there!?
?????: Someone found us?
Lancer:...being the hot headed hero can be a real giveaway sometimes.
Selena: That voice! Is that you, Lancer?
Lancer: Ah crap.
Selena: Were you peeping on us!?
?????: Seems that way.
Lancer: I wouldn't be if you two didn't find stew orgasmic!
Selena: Were you stalking us!?
Lancer: We all know you two were looking for me, because you couldn't bear being away from me for more than two measly days. You wanted me. That's why you have your catgirl friend here, right? For her to help look?
(http://media.giantbomb.com/uploads/0/3017/273244-final_fantasy_tactics_a2_viera_elementalist_large.png)
?????: For your information, I'm not a catgirl. I'm part of a race that has existed for centuries, but I am now its only surviving member.
Lancer: Then what's your name?
Selena: Wait, don't answ-
Marisa: The name's Marisa.
Lancer: Aha! Welcome to the cast, Marisa! And welcome the smell of adventure and testosterone! It may very well be too much for you to handle.
Selena: Why, Marisa? Why did you have to answer him?
Marisa: He asked me a question. I have to answer a question if I'm being asked it.
Selena: Whatever. Let's go back to town, and away from him.
(http://i272.photobucket.com/albums/jj193/otakucenter_com/tengen_toppa_guren_langann/kamina/kamina-sketch.gif)
Lancer: Look, we all know that-
(http://www.zeldauniverse.net/images/games/tp/characters/bulbin.png)
Lord Desert Mook: im in ur desrt, steelin ur womens
Selena: Eek! Marisa, help!
Marisa: I can't do anything without my staff! He just scooped us up off the ground and ran off!
Selena: Oh no...that means that...
(http://kumakorner.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/kamina.jpg)
Lancer: Women in danger? This sounds like a problem to be resolved by the WORLD'S GREATEST HERO! Worry not fair maiden, and fear not, fair rabbit girl! For I, the epitome of badass, shall give chase and rescue you!
...
...
Lancer: Immediately after I replenish my badass strength and testosterone by eating this stew that Selena was enjoying orgasmically.
Hey guys, see if you can pinpoint the exact moment where I inserted part of myself into Lancer, and pinpoint the other exact moment where I decided to stop with the jokes and progress on with Lancer's tale.
Yeah, this part sucks. But DO NOT LET THAT DISCOURAGE YOU. GO ONWARD AND CONTINUE WITH FAUX EPICNESS.
Suddenly a squirrel jumps out and bites your face.
You are now infected with rabies and have a serious craving for nuts.
And I am not implying the food.
QuoteMeanwhile, at a high school in an undisclosed location, there was a a boy wandering the halls, which was strange because it was a Saturday and normal people would be sleeping in around this time. Nevertheless, the boy, who couldn't afford to miss school for a day, found himself rushing to the school, and breaking into when he found out it was closed. Rational sense would have told him to go back home, but this genius boy was quite an idiot. And so, the boy continued wandering the halls without any apparent reason whatsoever.
"Dang."
The boy had pierced has brown skin climbing through the window. If anyone else saw the black boy in the black hoodie breaking into the school campus, they would called the police. Fortunately, no one wanted anything to do with school, and beside, the alarm system would have taken care of it.
Wiping up the red blood that leaked onto his skin, the boy suddenly had an epiphany of sorts.
Alarm system...but nothing went off. If that's true, then that means I'm not the first person to break in this school tonight! They must have cut it off, and I bet they're still here!
What the genius boy, didn't notice, however, was the small little muscular ripped devil hiding in the shadows. He also didn't notice the spear thrusting threw his neck; his brain didn't have enough time to comprehend his death.
As the boy fell to the ground, the devilish figure crept out of the shadows and tore off his head.
"He knows."
Then, as if filled with sudden hunger, the devil started greedily devoured the head off the boy.
"And now, I know."
"Good."
A taller, darker, more terrifying figure cam out of nowhere. The figure was silhouetted by the darkness, but it seemed to have sharper ears than a normal human.
"Looks like my spell worked."
Well, don't ask where I'm going with this. I just wanted to play along.
Then he looked at his kingdom, he was finally there, to sit on his throne as the Prince Of Bel-Air.
"Actually Moe, I think I'm in the mood for nuts tonight," the Destroyer said suddenly, turning to Moe with a devilish grin. "Human nuts."
"D-D-Dan... What are you... NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
---
"NOOOOOO!" Moe jumped up, awake from his dream. Sweat dripped down his forehead and his breathing was shallow.
"Holy Mary having sexual intercourse with a drunken Jesus while God watches! What in the frozen underworld is going on here!?" the Destroyer asked, after being awoken by Moe's screams.
"I had... dream... you... bit by squirrel.... ate.... my nuts," Moe panted, wiping the sweat away. "I'm never eating cow testicles again, god dangit, they give me nightmares..."
The Destroyer shrugged, then suddenly closed his eyes and waved his finger around again. "Destruction senses are booming!"
"Oh God, not this again," Moe said, rolling his eyes. "Fine, where to this time? Whatever it is, it better not be another god darn cow!"
"No, this time it's... long and wooden..." the Destroyer grumbled, trying to picture the source of his senses.
"...Long and... wooden..."
"Yes, very, very, long. I'd say the biggest I've ever seen! Oh God, it's so long and so... hard! Definitely at least a foot, I'd say!"
"My God."
"That wood is a footer, most definitely! Man, let's go toward it!"
"What!? Are you crazy!? DO YOU WANT PEOPLE TO THINK WE'RE GAY!? DO YOU THINK WE'RE GOING TO HAVE SOME SORT OF MESSED UP THREESOME? Because let me tell you something, and you listen good Dan, I only go for one type of threesome. And that's the Devil's favorite one. Or I'll take all three girls and watch, I'm fine with that, too. BUT GOD DAMMIT, THERE HAS TO BE AT LEAST TWO GIRLS, AND THE ONLY GUY IS GOING TO BE ME!"
"Huh?"
"...Devil's threesome?"
"I was just talking about the big spear, man."
"...What?"
"Come on! I sense a powerful source that way!" the Destroyer began running again, far away from their home, closer and closer to the lair of the generic villain's, and even closer still to the mystical Mac Guffin Spear...
However, it just so happened that this spear laid in a cave not 50 meters away from Simpleania and Bridgett had an inkling that something so amazing and awesome lurked in that cave that he could become the most bad-ass man in the world despite him looking WAY too much like a girl.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b392/BucketONothing/GurrenLagann/Kamina/kamina2h.jpg)
"So, my heroic instincts say save the women, ultimately leading to a cat fight between the two over my testosterone filled manliness, but I've spent hours walking in the same direction as that scoundrel Mook Lord, and I can't find him anywhere! IT'S A DAMN DESERT! WITH NO BUILDINGS, OR MOUNDS OF SAND TO OBSTRUCT MY VIEW! WHERE THE HELL DOES A GIANT OGRE/GOBLIN HIDE IN A PLACE LIKE THIS!? I DON'T FEEL BADASS ANYMORE! I JUST FEEL CONFUSION!"
(http://reapersforge.com/images/chester-bennington.jpg)
Chester Bennington: CRRRRAAAWWWWWLLIIIINGGGG IINNNNN MYYYY SKIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNN! THESE WOOOOOUUUUNNNNDSSS THEY WILLLLLL NOT HEEEAAALLLLLLLL...
"YOU STAY THE HELL OUT OF THIS, GODDAMMIT. I must find the maiden and the rabbit girl! Then, I will rent a hotel room for three, with two beds! Yes..."
Chester: WHAAAAAAAT IIIII'VE DOOOOOONE! I FACE MYSEEEELF! TO CROSS OUT WHAT IIIII'VE BEEEECOOOOME!
(http://quizilla.teennick.com/user_images/N/NO/NOW/Nowera/1152382425_erZeldaPoe.jpg)
Poe: Hi I'm a ghost lol
"A ghost? You must be the spirit of a traveler who cannot rest in peace, as your dying wish was to cross this desert! In an attempt to fill out the blanks in your map of the world, you sought out to venture across this lifeless display of death and sand, but in the end became a part of its meal. In the end, you couldn't rest in peace knowing that you failed your life ambition, and so you're here now, to aid me in my perilous desert journey!"
Poe: lol no, I just help people cross the desert.
"Silence, departed spirit! I must ask you for your help! Have you seen a repulsive green ogre, riding a blue boar, carrying two female individuals with him?"
Poe: Ya
"Are you aware of the direction in which they rode in?"
Poe: Ya
"Can you guide me to them, so that I may kill this repulsive ogre and bring peace to this desert, and your soul?"
Poe: Ya
"FUCK YEAH, LET'S GO RESCUE SOME WOMEN! Please, Selena, and Marisa. Be patient, for your savior, Lancer Von Drake, shall rescue you in your time of need, after which we shall all travel together in search of the legendary spear that will pierce the heavens, and open the path to our destinies!"
Poe:...
"On a related note, you wouldn't happen to know where this spear is, would you?"
Poe: lol no
"GODDAMMIT!"
(http://irregularbloggers.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/kamina.gif)
"BROTHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR"
I rushed this towards the end, if it wasn't obvious. D:
My retcon arsenal is glorious.
QuotePoe: Hi I'm a ghost lol
For some reason I laughed at this.
KJ, I have a question. Is it Moe as in "Moh", or Moe as in "Moh-eh"?
Also, too lazy to write. Busy playing Plants vs Zombies.
BUT DO NOT LET THAT DISCOURAGE YOU. EPICALLY WRITE A STORY OF EPIC PROPORTIONS WHILST EATING AN EPIC POTATO CHIP WITH EPIC LATIN VOCALS WITH EPIC CAMERAWORK WITH AN EPIC VOICE.
Quote from: Striker Sky on February 24, 2010, 03:37:29 PM
KJ, I have a question. Is it Moe as in "Moh", or Moe as in "Moh-eh"?
Also, too lazy to write. Busy playing Plants vs Zombies.
BUT DO NOT LET THAT DISCOURAGE YOU. EPICALLY WRITE A STORY OF EPIC PROPORTIONS WHILST EATING AN EPIC POTATO CHIP WITH EPIC LATIN VOCALS WITH EPIC CAMERAWORK WITH AN EPIC VOICE.
According to No More Heroes, it's the second.
Quote from: Dontimpersonateadminskthx on February 24, 2010, 03:38:12 PM
According to No More Heroes, it's the second.
But according to me, it's the first. Because I'm basing the name off of something other than No More Heroes.
NOW I WILL EPICALLY DEPART THIS THREAD BECAUSE I AM TOO LAZY TO EPICALLY WRITE AN EPIC STORY AT THIS VERY EPIC MOMENT.
Epic Reply #19. We are now close to our #285 ending. I guess you can consider this post filler or something.
Epic Reply #20: I'm too tired to write something up. Shoveling pounds of slush can do that to you.
...I'm not sure why, but a chill just ran up my spine.
Epic Reply # 21: And now, to add more epicness, I shall introduce a new hero to the story.
Captain Gordon, Defender of Earth enters the most epic story on the interwebs!
The Destroyer used one of his super-ultra-awesome-epic-kong fu-action-Jesus powers to arrive in Simpleania.
"My destructive senses say the mighty spear is near this town!" the Destroyer stated epically.
"This town is so simple that it's boring," Moe added, looking around. "I guess we should start searching for that spear?"
"Or we could start searching for... the ladies! I wish to give a young maiden her flower, if you know what I mean."
"...Go for it, stud."
AND SO THEY WENT OFF... EPICALLY IN SEARCH OF YOUNG MAIDENS TO CORRUPT! Will they pull themselves together in time to find that spear? Probably not. But if sex is involved, then who cares!
(http://img3.ak.crunchyroll.com/i/spire1/0d27906d43ed76714b5c7197985d986b1225022947_full.jpg)
"...where the
hell are you taking me, o departed spirit?"
(http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/nintendo/en/images/thumb/7/71/Poe.jpg/180px-Poe.jpg)
"i take offense to that"
"My apologies, departed spirit. I forgot that you were...well, a departed spirit. Uttering the name of a place as foul and wretched as hell is unacceptable in the presence of a being such as yourself."
"its okay lol"
"You've been guiding me to the destination of these women for hours now, and I haven't heard your name yet. Would you care to tell me what it is?"
"i'm eduardo"
"Eduardo! The purple furred, two horned monster!"
"no, eduardo as in the spaniard who tried to flee his town and got killed"
"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that, Eduardo. How much longer must we travel before arriving at the location where the giant green ogre has taken my female acquaintances?"
"at the speed we're traveling?"
"Precisely."
"one more day"
(http://th08.deviantart.net/fs25/300W/f/2008/075/1/a/Double_K___Kamina_by_rocketcica.png)
"If we sprint the rest of the way there, surely we will reach our destination within minutes! Onward, Eduardo! My Love Interests await me!"
"klol lets go"
I'm too tired to write the rest ;_;
Quote from: Dr.Hobo2 on February 25, 2010, 09:12:07 PM
Epic Reply # 21: And now, to add more epicness, I shall introduce a new hero to the story.
Captain Gordon, Defender of Earth enters the most epic story on the interwebs!
HOLY GOD THIS IS AMAZING
...WHO'S STORY IS HE GOING TO APPEAR IN
I dunno...Oh, how 'bout YOURS! =O
And by decree of the all mighty Dr.Hobo2, Gordon's ship crashed into the desert wasteland not too far from the orge's dwelling. He stepped out from his now-dusty space ship and onto the desolate new world.
"Hm... I -- Captain Gordon, Defender of Earth -- sense female distress nearby. It is my duty as Defender to go save them!"
He grabbed his trusty Photon Phaser Laser and prepared to heroically barge in and save those poor damsels in distresses..seses...!!
------------------------
And suddenly, a giant firey meteor starts to crash down toward Earth. It seems unstoppable!
WHAT EVER WILL OUR HEROES DO?!
------------------------
Quote from: Dr.Hobo2 on March 02, 2010, 10:40:48 PM
I dunno...Oh, how 'bout YOURS! =O
But I haven't played Disgaea ;_;
Quote from: Riddler on March 02, 2010, 11:19:45 PM
------------------------
And suddenly, a giant firey meteor starts to crash down toward Earth. It seems unstoppable!
WHAT EVER WILL OUR HEROES DO?!
------------------------
THE QUESTION IS, WHEN WILL THIS METEOR IMPACT ON THE PLANET?
FIND OUT TOMORROW, AS WE FORGET ABOUT THIS AMAZING PLOT SETUP, AND BRING IT BACK NEAR THE END OF THIS THREAD AS A BRICK JOKE
(http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1252/867874838_487efd99e9.jpg)
"...I think we're lost."
"were not lost"
"We're lost."
"we-"
"WE'RE LOST BECAUSE I SAY SO! AND IF WE ARE NOT LOST, THEN I WILL FORCIBLY TRAVEL IN A DIFFERENT DIRECTION WITH YOU SO THAT MY STATEMENT CAN BECOME TRUE!"
";-;"
"I'm sorry, Eduardo. I do not know what came over me."
"actually i think we are lost"
"Then onward! Let us walk forward with Determination to find those two women and rescue them! If we believe, surely we can find our way!"
WHY DOES NO ONE POST ANYMORE ADSLAKHALHDGLHK
Daniel and his sidekick, Moe, continued their adventures. They needed to obtain the spear to destroy the world!
"No, we're saving the world."
Oh, right... Sorry, I just came back from announcing the plans of the villain at his lair.
"Wait, what? What is he planning? Tell me!"
So anyway-
"No, wait! What the intercourse does the villain dude want to do?"
AHEM. Daniel and Moe continued their journey-
"FUCKING TELL ME. I don't have all day to get some stupid spear, find where the intercourse ing poop hole lives, and then almost kill him before he somehow gets away even though I have the power to destroy him inside of my pinky finger. I DON'T HAVE ALL WEEK JUST TO DO THIS! I HAVE A LIFE AND A FAMILY BACK HOME WHO DON'T KNOW MY SECRET IDENTITY, YOU KNOW."
I signed a NDA, so I kind of can't tell you anything, sorry...
"...What? Who made you sign that?"
Well, when I joined the company to start announcing this stuff...
"What company?"
MTV. Their the ones sponsoring this reality show.
"R-Reality... show...?"
Oh, shi- *ASPLODES*
*Different announcer's voice* And so, check out next week in which our heroes are brainwa- er, completely forget about the fact that they are on a reality show. No, wait, they don't forget. They just, continue on and ignore the cameras... Uh... So, next week we're just going to pretend this episode didn't air! Um, right... So... Oh, I think that's Bob calling me, so I better be going... WATCH NEXT WEEK'S EPISODE! I'LL BE YOUR NEW ANNOUNCER! LISTEN FOR ME! ...Uh, coming Bob!
THE END.
(http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:Ywzk4hk4I3q8rM:http://www.maniacworld.com/angry-german-kid-with-subtitles.jpg)
OH NO!!! THE FIRST BOSS HAS APPEARED!!!! THE ANGRY GERMAN KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I have nothing better, deal with it
Quote from: F'lar on March 14, 2010, 09:42:55 PM
(http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:Ywzk4hk4I3q8rM:http://www.maniacworld.com/angry-german-kid-with-subtitles.jpg)
OH NO!!! THE FIRST BOSS HAS APPEARED!!!! THE ANGRY GERMAN KID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I have nothing better, deal with it
*Destroyer Man steals all the keys to his keyboard with his awesome destructive powers*
(http://static.gamesradar.com/images/mb/GamesRadar/us/Features/2008/11/Top%207%20Outrageously%20Camp%20Bad%20Guys/Destroyman--article_image.jpg)
DID SOMEONE SAY DESTROYMAN???
Angry German Kids uses DANCING MAD!
...
IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!
(http://www.dailynintendo.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/destroyman-2.jpg)
/me USED PLASMA HAND
/me STARTED TO FAP VIGOROUSLY
(http://911research.wtc7.net/wtc/evidence/docs/nt_dust_aerial2c.jpg)
"..."
"..."
"The hell was that?"
"idk lol"
"I guess we'll pretend that never happened. Sounded like a german kid raging and promptly exploding."
"also we're here"
"We are? Marvelous job, my small spiritual friend! Let us go and-wait, I do not see it! There's nothing in front of us! Just...sand!"
"look down"
"Of course! By looking down, I will find...a large steel door?"
"ya"
"...This is where that foul beast lurks, am I correct?"
"ya"
"Thank you for guiding me to this location, o kindred spirit! I will pay respect for you in the future!"
"kthxbai"
And with those last few words, Eduardo vanished without a trace. His words echoed through the silent field of sand, the field that our hero, Lancer was now standing upon. Lancer looked at the steel door and steeled himself for a rescue mission. Being the courageous hero he is, he stared down at the door for one, long minute.
(http://blogs.gamefilia.com/files/imce/u395291/AviKamina.jpg)
"Well, this should be entertaining. Worry not, my fair damsels! For I, the self proclaimed savior of women shall rescue you, so that I can have two female individuals fall madly in love with me! And I shall shun the two of you, to drive you into each others arms, while I...walk..."
Lancer's voice trailed off as he was revealing more of his hot-headed nature. The wind had settled down, and with it, he saw footprints. Footprints that didn't seem to match up with the ogre's tiny feet, or with the female's rather stereotypical aesthetics. The footprints came from a crashed spaceship, not too far off in the distance. A thought immediately occurred to Lancer as he saw these footprints.
(http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b392/BucketONothing/GurrenLagann/Kamina/kamina2h.jpg)
"Has...someone already entered this foul beast's lair and embarked on a rescue mission themselves!? I can't allow this! Whoever you are, oh mystery hero, I will find you! And I will subdue you! Then, I shall rescue the women myself!"
YES I RUSHED THIS
However after completing that sentence a time bomb is quickly strapped onto him. Leaving the roman numerals:
V : XXXXXIX