Know your stars of SSBB

[Triforce_Luigi]

Yay for bribing and cheating!

[DededeCloneChris]

Eh, I didn't expected this.

Meta Knight was flying his random ship with a random name like the Battleship Halberd whilst flying over some random mountains when all of a sudden, a random door appeared outta nowhere!
Meta Knight looked at the door. Something strange was drawing him toward it. He let go of the steering wheel and opened the door. Inside the door, Meta Knight noted a chair engulfed in a spotlight. Meta Knight waked over to the chair and sat down.

"Know your stars... Know your stars..." A voice echoed in the room.

Meta Knight just looked around the room.

"Meta Knight of Dream Land..." The voice said.

Meta Knight said not a thing.

"Meta Knight... He has a collection of Barbie dolls."

Meta Knight remained silent, but his fists tightened.

"Meta Knight... He's a Kirby in armour."

Meta Knight's fists tightened more.

"Meta Knight... He has lice. Wait he doesn't have ha- ...Meta Knight... He's bald."

Meta Knight took out a sign that read 'That's the truth, genius'.

"Meta Knight... He doesn't like to talk. That's why he's so quiet."

"Oh, be quiet!" Meta Knight snapped.

"Eh?"

"You were insulting me! I don't like being insulted! Well, technically, nobody does, but that's not the point! How dare you insult me! I demand a lawyer!"

Suddenly, the door burst open. A man in a blue suit and spikey hair walked in, holding a briefcase.

"Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney!" The man said, "Master lawyer, at your service!"

"Actually, I was just making a point." Meta Knight stated blandly.

"Oh." Phoenix said. He walked over to Meta Knight and handed him a piece of paper, "My card, for later." He ran out of the room.

"Okay..." The voice said, "That was weird..."

"Yeah..." Meta Knight agreed.

"Hey, did you know that if switch the 't' and the 'a' in 'Meta', you get 'Meat Knight'?"

"...Yes."

"Oh. ... ...Hey, did you ever realise that your sword is shaped like a flame?"

"...Yes."

"Oh. ... ...Hey, did you know that your cape can transform into a pair of wings?"

"...Y- Actually, no."

"Cooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool..."

"Yeah... Hey, did you ever realise that your an idiot?"

"N- ...Well, my brother calls me that, but he just ends up at the bottom of the ocean afterwards."

"Ah. I see."

"Meta Knight... He is bad at making jokes."

"Jokes? That's not true! What did the frog say when he looked at a book? 'Read it'. Get it? 'Ribbit', 'read it'."

"Not funny, Meat Knight."

"That's META Knight, to you!"

"Riiiiiiiiiiight..."

"Here's something else: Wanna here a joke? I fart and you choke. Wanna here another? I fart and you smother!"

"Hardy har har."

"Uh... er... um... I've got nothing."

'Hey, Meat Knight?"

"META Knight! And, what?"

"You came into the door from the Battleship Halberd, right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Who's flying it?"

Meat Knight raised a finger, as if about to make a point. His yellow eyes widend, and he ran out of the room.

"Oh boy." The voice sighed.

Heh. Meat Knight. Heh. Heh heh.

The Voice: Know Your Stars: SSB is brought to you by lawyers; no lawyers equals more lost cases, plus no addicting Phoenix Write games. And by swords; Swordsman wouldn't only not exist, but they wouldn't be good at fighting with fish poles.

(Wiiboychris notes: Maybe the ancient minister took the ship when he wasn't there!)

[Tupin]

You seriously didn't know that All That used to do this? :D

[Triforce_Luigi]

Yay swords and lawyers!

[DededeCloneChris]

Okay, this will be the last chapter for now, unfortunaly, the author of this fan fic is quite busy, but I gonna put the smash mansion here.

Petey was randomly walking around Bianco Hills holding two random cages, each holding a random princess, when all of a sudden, a random door appeared outta nowhere! Petey, who was happily walking to the giant windmill, fell down on his tuchus. The princesses, who were Peach and Zelda, started yelling.

"Petey! Get back up!"

"The bars are driving into our backs!"

Petey got up on his toe-less feet and walked towards the door. He looked at the door for a while, then smashed Zelda's cage into it.

"Ow!" Zelda cried.

Ignoring Zelda's cry in pain, Petey struck Peach's cage against the door.

"Eek!" Peach screeched.

"ROOOOOOOOAR!" Petey smashed his own head against it. The impact on the door was so great, that the door broke! Petey fell to the ground face first.

...But another door landed on Petey's neck.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!" Petey screamed in pain. He jumped back up, making the door fly behind him and hit a tree. The door fell down to the earth, and Petey opened it. Inside he saw a chair engulfed in a spotlight. Petey walked over to the chair and put down the princess' cages.

"Know your stars... Know your stars..." A voice echoed in the room.

"Heey..." Peach said, "I remember this..."

"Princess Peach!" The voice said, "Long time no see!"

"Oh, no, not you again!"

"Yep, me again!"

"You're that voice that made fun of me!"

"The one and only."

"Ohhh..." Peach was growing angry, "If I get out of here, you'll regret it!"

"I'm sure I would. Now, where was I? ...Oh, yeah. Petey Piranha of Bianco Hills..."

"Arrroo?" Petey asked.

"Ugh. I'm gonna have to give you a translator." A translator was thrown down to Petey. Petey swallowed it whole.

"Hey, I speak English!" Petey cheered.

"Petey... He loves Peach and Zelda."

"Huuh?" Both Princesses asked.

"Don't fall for it!" Peach said, "He's jsut making that up!"

"SILENCE!" The voice pressed a button on his keyboard, and Peach suddenly got duct tape over her mouth.

"Mmmmm! Mmmm mmm!" Peach's muffled voice said.

"Anyway... Yeah, Petey just loves the Princesses. He asked the Ancient Minister personally if he could kidnap you two."

"Hey! That's not true!" Petey objected, "I just wanted to help! I was just doing it for the food!"

"No, you weren't. I have undeniable proof that you asked the Ancient Minister." The voice held up a small DVD. He placed it in the DVD player and pressed play. ALl around the room, small, holographic monitors appeared.

"Arooo?" The Petey in the movie said (Tranlsation: Can I kidnap the princesses?). The A.M. (Ancient Minister) nodded. The monitors dissapered.

"And that's your proof." The voice said, taking the DVD and cracking it in half.

"Lies! All lies!" Petey protested. Zelda had absolutly no idea what was going on.

"Petey... He's very fat."

"I take that personally!"

"Then how come, in Super Mario Sunshine, the windmill roof cracked with you on it?"

"Mario was on it, too, and I screamed, and then it cracked!"

"Now that's a lie."

"C'mon! Be fair!"

"Mmm! Mmmmmm!"

"Not now, Peach!" Peatey and the voice yelled. Peach only nodded.

"If I could just say something..." Zelda started.

"Not now, Zelda!" Petey and the voice yelled. Zelda only nodded.

"Petey, I just got a question." The voice asked.

"What?"

"How can those little leaf arms make you fly?"

Petey opened his mouth to say something, but nothing got out. He just spit out the translator and, with the two cages, dashed out of the room.

"... ...He never answered my question..."

The voice: Know your stars: SSB is brought to you by duct tape; grey tape that sticks to anything. And by DVDs; small, compact discs used to watch videos.

[DededeCloneChris]

Time for the smash mansion! Ok, be warned, this fan fic is from the same actor, but it has something maybe a lttle stupid.................time to go on.

Disclaimer: I REALLY doesn't know who the hell is Tyler and Ryxler.

With the special participation of Master Hand and Crazy hand!
Also by Ashley, Shadow, Wind waker Link, Ridley and Bowser jr.

In the (not-so) quiet city of Nintendo City, there resided a giant mansion-type thing. It was 33 stories high, and yet, it weighed 3 pounds. It had many bedrooms, and it had a garden, and a pool, and a backyard, and a living room, and a washroom or two, and... uh, and... and, er, it had many bedrooms.
So one fine and beautiful day (it was rainy and foggy), Master and Crazy Hand decided to make another game.

"We shall make another game!" Master announced, "I'll get the newcomers!"

"And I'll get the cookies!" Crazy said. They both nodded, and Crazy rushed out the door, and Master broke out the oh-so hated phone.

"'Why do I hate it oh-so much?' you may ask." Master said to you, "How do I hold a phone in my hand to my ear when I my body is a hand and no ear?!"

Ordering a wire frame to hold the phone to his non-existing ear, Master began talking.

"Hello, Diddy Kong? I have a proposition for you... What do you mean 'Oooh ooh ooh ahh'!? This is a once in a life time chance, bud! If you don't want to see DK again, you'll hang up right now! ...Oh, you DIDN'T hang up. Well, here's what I want you to do. Get your's and Funky Kong's hairy banana-butts over here so you two can join the Smashers! ...Yes, Funky! He's basically as strong as DK, and 101 per cent smarter! Now, get on o'er here!"

The wire frame hung up the phone and Master started to sob.

"I hate being mean!!" He cried. The wire frame patted his back, "(sinff) Th-thank you, Joe." Master thanked the (female) wire frame, "Okay, let's call somebody else!" The (female) wire frame named Joe nodded and picked up the phone.

"Hello, Wario! Master Hand here. I've got a proposition for you. How 'bout you and one of your employees come and join Smash Bros.!? ...Yes, you get paid. Not once a month, not once a week, once a day." The wire frame had to pull the phone away slightly from Master because of Wario's scream, "So is that a yes? Perfect! ...You say I should pick who comes? ...Oh, I see. Hmm... Well, Kat and Ana are ninjas... They could use some random ninjustu, or somethin'... Orbulon is an alien... He could use lazer guns... Oh! The witch girl, Ashley! ...Why her? 'Cause she use dark magic, and I'm all about dark magic! Now get your butts over here!"

The wire frame hung up.

"Yay! That's four newcomers! Let's see how Crazy's doing, shall we?" Master asked.

IN DA KITCHEN

Everything was on fire because of Crazy's cookies.

UP IN MASTER'S ROOM

"We'll get into detail with Crazy's cookies later." Master said, then he started to chuckle, "Heh. Crazy's cookies. Heh. Heh heh."

The wire frame picked up the phone.

"Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood morning! So, first things first: You know me, right? ...No, I'm not Crazy, I'm Master... Oh. That was an insult. And, for your information, I am most perfectly sane. ...Well, I am sometimes. Getting off-topic, I am! So, anyway, you've always wanted to be in the Smash Bros. business, right? ...You never. Oh well, I'm inviting you to join up in our tournaments! To join up, just stay on the line! ...Hello?"

The wire frame hung up the phone. It tilted its head.

"That was some Vaati guy." Master answered.

The wire frame nodded, meaning it understood.

"Okay, I'm gonna call Nintendo's rival now!"

The wire frame put its hands in front of its non-existing mouth, in a shockingly guesture.

"That's right! I'm crossing over Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog! This will be the first time this ever happened!" The wire frame whispered something to Master, "...'Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games'? Aw, geez..." Master sighed in defeat, "But, I'll be the second to do it!"

The wire frame put the phone to Master Hand's... uh, hand.

"Sonic! How are ya? ...This is Master Hand. Ah, I knew you'd remember! ...Yeah, I was the one who rejected you the last two times. Sorry! I'm here to ask you back! Please please please please please!!!! ...You will? Great! You can bring someone else along with you! Someone who will put up a good fight. ...Yeah, Shadow! He'll fit into the 'Shady Characters' section! HA HA HA HA HA ha ha ha ha... Yeah, not funny. Be here soon!"

The wire frame hung up.

"Great! Unlike the Olympic games, this will get the fans asking, 'Who's stronger? Mario or Sonic?'. Ooh, I'm tingling all over!" Master started twitching uncontrollably, "I'll call more later, I've got to prepare!" Master, along with the wire frame, floated/ran out of the room.

[Triforce_Luigi]

Duct tape and DVDs can fix anything.

[DededeCloneChris]

I warn you, this is more stupid.

Chapter 2: the noobs (note: Maybe some characters that I mentioned before are in another fan fic)

Master and the Wire Frame ran (or floated) down the steps into the kitchen, which was still on fire from Crazy's cookies. Master and the wire frame never seemed to notice, because they ran (or floated) right past it.

The two ran (floated) down the hall into the hallway closet. The took out some supplies, like balloons, streamers, confetti and banners that read, 'WELCOME!', in big bold letters. The took the stuff in their hand(s), and ran (floated) down the hallway into the foyer.

They hung the streamers over the door, and blew up the balloons and strung them to the walls. They poured the confetti in a bucket, and placed it on the slightly opened door. Lastly, they hung the banners on the wall next to the living room, so that the noobs can see it.

Master and the wire frame nodded at each other, and ran (floated) back up the stairs, still failing to notice the continuing to burn kitchen.

IN MASTER'S ROOM

"Alright, we put up the welcome junk." Master said. The wire frame check off a box on a clipboard, "Now all we have to do is get more newcomers!"The wire frame nodded and put down the clipboard, "By the way, did you happen to smell the smell of smoke and burning cookies?" The wire frame shook its head, "Strange... I hope Crazy's alright."

IN DA KITCHEN

Crazy's unconcious body started to burn.

IN MASTER'S ROOM

"Anyway, let's start calling!" Master said excitedly. The wire frame picked up the phone.

"Hello, princess! Princess Daisy! It's me, Master Hand! Yes, you remember me! ...Why am I calling? I wanted to tell you that there is another Smash Bros. game coming out, and I wanted you to join! ...Great! Oh, and you can bring someone else, too. ...Him? Bowser Jr.? Well, alright. ...No, I'm okay with it! I just find it... a little awkward that you, of all people, want to bring Bowser's son alon- ...No, no, I'm not saying you're crule! i'm just sayi- ...Okay, see you two then!"

The wire frame hung up.

"Okay, we got Diddy Kong, Funky Kong, Wario, Ashley, Sonic, Shadow, Daisy, and Bowser Jr. I know a couple more who could come, too."

The wire frame picked up the phone.

"Hello, Meta Knight! Master Hand here. I wanted to offer you a job here. ...Okay! You can aske anyone else to come, too! ...You're not going to? Well, okay. See you!"

The wire frame pressed a button on the phone.

"...Mr. Trainer! Hello! I'd like to offer you a job. ...Master Hand. ...Uh-huh... uh-huh... uh-huh... Oh, yeah, that can be arranged. Okay, see you, Squirtle, Ivysaur, and Charizard then!"

The wire frame pressed another button.

"Solid Snake! Mater Hand from Nintendo calling. I was wondering if you would be up for joining the Smashers and participating in our monthly tournaments. ...Oh, sure, just one thing. I find that guns are just too violent for Nintendo, so hows about you use them there trusty bombs 'a your's? ...Great! See ya!"

The wire frame pressed, yet again, another button.

"Hello, Sky World? May I speak with Pit, please? It's urgent. ...Hmm hmm hmm hmm hmm..." The wire frame tilted its head, "I'm on hold." Master told it, "...Ah! Pit! I have a job offering for you. May I offer you to come join the Smashers? ...Super. Come before dark!"

Another button.

"Hello, is Lucas home? Thanks. ... ... ... ...Hey, Lucas! ...Who's this? You've heard of the wonderful and magnificient Master Hand, haven't you? ...Not the wonderful and magnificient parts, huh? Well, anyway, I have to ask you something. Will you, Lucas of where-ever-your-from, come join the Smashers? ...Look, it doesn't matter where your from. I'm offering you a well-paying job! ...Okay, see you then!"

'Nother button.

"...Ike! How're you? ...Good to here! So, has that Ragnell, or whatever it is? Good, eh? So, how would you like to come smash it up with the Smashers? ...Well, that's wonderful to hear! So, be here before dark! I want everyone to meet you and the other newcomers!"

The wire frame (finally) hung up.

"That's enough for now. I'm going to go check on Crazy."

Master Hand left the room via making a hole in the floor by crashing through it.

IN DA KITCHEN

Master entered the kitchen via a hole made in the ceiling. He looked around the kitchen. It was completely normal.

"Wow! The kitchen looks as if it's never been on fire!" Master said.

"I know, huh?" Crazy said, wearing an apron, which was a couple sizes ('bout twenty-nine) too small. In his oversized hand was a tray of cookies.

"Crazy!" Master said, "They look delicious!" Master tried to swipe one, but Crazy pulled them away.

"Nu-uh!" Crazy said, "Not until the noobs get here!"

Ding-Dong!

"They're here!" Crazy yelled, giving a cookie to Master.

Master floated to the foyer, where Mewtwo was standing.

"I never told you about the noobs." Master said.

"You never." Mewtwo said, "We're waiting for the pizza."

"Oh." Was all Master could say. Master opened the door, with the bucket of confetti falling on him. He never noticed it, because what he saw was shocking.

"It is the noobs!" Crazy yelled, suddenly appearing behind Master.

"It is the pizza!" Ness shouted, appearing behind Mewtwo.

Yep, it was. It was Diddy, Funky, Wario, and Ashley eating the pizza.

"Nooo!!" Mewtwo began to cry, "Not the pizza! Why the pizza!?!"

"Calm own, Mewtwo!" Crazy said, trying to comfort him, "It's alright! We'll order another pizza!"

"You don't understand, Crazy! " Mewtwo continued to sob, "That pizza cost $5.99!"

"Oh, Mewtwo, WHY!?!" Crazy said, floating to the corner and entering the fetal position.

"...What's with him?" Wario asked, looking at Crazy.

"He's in the fetal position." Master answered.

"We know that." Funky said, "But, why?"

"Hmm... Good question. We'll hafta get back to you on that." Ness said.

"Okay..." Ashley said, "So, can we come in now?"

"Yeah, my fur's getting cold!" Diddy complained, hugging himself to keep warm.

"Yeah, yeah," Master said, "Ness here has volunteered to show you guys around."

"What?" Ness said, "I never-"

"Now, if you guys excuse me, I need to make one more phone call."

Master crashed through the ceiling.

IN MASTER'S ROOM

Master made another hole through the floor (right next to the first one, by the way). The wire frame was still standing where it was when Master left.

"Okay, Joe!" Master said, "One more phone call!"

The wire frame picked up the phone.

"...Hello, my dear friend! Yes, Master Hand here. I was wondering... Would you, my good friends, like to join up in the Brawl?! ...I'll take that scream of joy for a yes. So, we've gotten other newbies, so, if you guys could just come over before dark... Perfect! See you then!"

The wire frame put down the phone and looked at Master.

"Those two young boys were none other than... Tyler & Ryxlet!"

[DededeCloneChris]

Chapter 3: They arrive! Hooray!

Master Hand floated back down the stairs. Ness was (glumly) showing Diddy, Funky, Wario, and Ashley around the Mansion. Ness glared at Master, then walked into the living room. Diddy had brought a red guitar with him, and he was playing it. Funky was using some sort of barrel mechanism to keep him floated in the air. He was moving forward, and he hit one of the two bongos to turn left or right. Wario was eating two silces of cake, one in each hand. He took a bite out of one, then turned to the other and began biting that one. Ashley had brought a stuffed rabbit, not to mention a little red devil-chao.

"I'm not a devil-chao!" The red thing yelled at me, "I'm just a little guy named Red!"

Red had a vein on his head and he followed Ashley. Master sighed and shook his hand(?). Master made his way to the front door and opened it, hoping some more peeps would come. Suddenly, there were two bursts of wind zooming past Master. One had a slight blue color to it, the other black. Master turned around to see Sega's mascot and his rival.

"Sonic! Shadow! I was wondering when you two would get here!" Master cheered.

"Well, it was easier when we saw that sign that said 'Smash Mansion This Way!'." Sonic said.

"I told you we should've went left at the fork in the road." Shadow said to Sonic.

"Well, excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me for following my instincs, Shadow!" The blue blur said, "At least I didn't stop at every McDonald's we past!"

"I can't help it! I just love the little toys they give out!" Shadow complained.

"Hey, just so you two can know," Master said, breaking up their own little brawl, "Ness is giving a tour to some other newcomers. You can go with them, if you want."

"Cool!" Sonic said, "I'm going. See you two later!" Sonic dashed off.

"Hmph." Shadow grunted, "I'm going out for a little while." Shadow walked out the door. Master, with his keen hearing ability (even though he had no ears), picked up Shadow's stomach growling and loose change in his pocket.

"Woah! 'Scuse me, black hedgehog-thing."

Master turned back to the door. Coming inside was Daisy and Jr. Daisy had a large, orange suitcase in her hand, while Bowser Jr. was carrying a small, green track bag and a stuffed Paratroopa.

"Daisy! Bowser Jr.!" Master said. He turned to the stairs, "Peach! Bowser! Get yer butts down 'ere!" Princess Toadstool and King Koopa rushed their butts downstairs. Upon reaching the floor, they saw their cousin/son.

"Daisy!" Peach squealed, running up to Daisy and hugging her.

"Peach!" Daisy yelled, returning the hug.

"Junior!" Bowser ran up to his son and hugged him.

"Papa!" Jr. hugged Bowser back.

"Master!" Master Hand randomly yelled. The four walked back upstairs.

Master waited for some more people. Outside, there was a giant ship flying in. A small dot on the ship jumped off and flew down to the mansion.

"Meta Knight! I was expecting you!" Master said.

"Of course you were!" Meta Knight said, "Everyone expects me!"

"Right..." Master said, though he wasn't so sure.

"Anyway, I'm going to my room." Meta Knight walked up the stairs. (Master made the rooms in between chapter 2 and this one!)

"Okay, so Sonic, Shadow, Daisy, Junior, and Meta Knight have made it. Let's see who else comes."

Master waited by the door. There was the distinct sound of a bicycle approaching. Master Hand looked to the right and waited its arrival. He heard the bike perfectly, but he never saw anything.

"Over here!"

Master would've jumped out of his glove if it wasn't super-glued to his body. He turned around to see the Pokémon Trainer standing there, on his bike.

"Mr. Trainer!" Master said, floating over to him, "How are you?"

"Oh, fine, fine!" The Pokémon Trainer said, "I just want to rest. Do you have any idea how long it is to ride from here to Kanto?"

"Nu-uh."

"Oh, well. I've gotta rest." The Pokémon Trainer slowly and weakly entered the mansion.

"Okay, so Mr. Trainer is here." Master said, "Now all I have to do is wait for-"

Something bumped into Master. He looked down to see a cardboard box with the Nintendo logo on it move around him.

"Is that you, Snake?!" Master said.

"Crud." A voice from the box whined, "Caught." The box was lifted up and Solid Snake stood up.

"It's nice to meet you in person, Snake." Master said.

Snake stared at him for a few seconds, "When they said you're an oversized, glover-wearing, gravity-defying hand, they weren't kidding."

"Har har." Master faked amusement, "Get in, boy."

"I should tell you I'm over thirty." Snake informed.

"And I'm over 15,000." Master countered.

"...Drat." Snake walked in the Mansion."

"Snake joins the brawl!" Master said, "Now all there's left to do is wait for-"

Suddenly, a bright light filled the sky. Master Hand had to close his non-exsisting eyes to make out what was flying down to the earth. When it landed, Master realised it was an angle! With angle wings!

"Pit!" Master said, "I'm glad you could make it!"

"I appreciate your job offering, Mr. Hand." Pit said, bowing.

"Please, call me Master."

"Yes sir, Mr. Master!" Pit saluted. Master sighed.

"Now, get in there and wash those wings." Master instructed.

"Aye aye, Mr. Master Hand!" Pit gave a thumbs up and ran inside. Master sweat dropped.

"Never seen such a suck-up." Master muttered. Then, a car pulled up to the front door. A boy with yellow spiky hair got out of the car.

"Thanks for dropping me off, mom!" The boy said, "I'll see you in a year!" The car drove off and the boy turned around.

"Lucas!" Master said, flying up to him.

"Hi, Master Hand!" Lucas said.

"I'm happy that you're mother said you could come!"

"Yeah, I had to give up my year's allowence, but, that's okay."

"Well, you'll be getting paid more than a year's allowence by the end of the year."

"SWEET!" Lucas skipped inside. Master smiled to himself, and noticed a figure coming down the street. Who was it?

"Ike!" Master said. Ike walked up to him, "So nice to see you!"

"Likewise." Ike said, "Now, can I go lie down? It's tough to walk all the way from my homeland to here."

"Very well! You may sleep at once!" Master said. Ike nodded and fell asleep standing up, "I meant in your room." Ike woke up, smiled sheepishly, and walked to his room, "Only two more people left! I can't wait!"

"MASTER!" Ness yelled from the mansion, "WARIO'S EATING EVERYTHING!!"

"Oh my! If Wario eats everything, that'll leave nothing for Yoshi and Kirby!" Master Hand sped off to the mansion.

HALF AN HOUR LATER

Master sighed. It was tough to pull Wario away from the kitchen fridge, especially with his (extremly) over-weight body. But, Master managed to yank him out.

He had been waiting for 29 minutes, waiting for Tyler and Ryxlet to show up. The sun was just about set, and there was no sign of them.

"They might've been caught in traffic." Crazy said, appearing behind Master, still wearing the twenty-nine sizes too small apron.

"How could they have gotten into traffic?" Master asked, "For one thing, they're only fourteen; they aren't old enough to drive. For another, they're coming from another world, Crazy, like Sonic, Shadow and Snake!"

Then, a burst of light shone down next to Master Hand. Two figures stepped out of it.

Master immidiently sat up right, "Tyler! Ryxlet!" Master zoomed over to them, "What took you guys so long!?"

"We got stuck in traffic." Tyler answered.

"Well, maybe if we took that right in the road, like I said, we would've been here earlier!" Ryxlet said to Tyler.

"Maybe we souldn't of eaten at every Subway along the way, eh?!" Tyler shot back.

"I'm just another fan of the twelve inch subs, okay!?"

"Boys, boys, settle down!" Master said, breaking up their own littlw brawl, "The main thing is that you're here now!"

"Oh, yeah. I forgot that." Tyler said.

"Now get inside, and go get ready for the tutorials!"

"Yes, sir!" Tyler and Ryxlet ran into the mansion.

[DededeCloneChris]

Chapter 4 Demostration battle: The first n' last.

"Huh..." Master was exhausted after waiting for everyone, "It's exhausting to wait for everyone. But, now I have to give around a letter about meeting the noobies to each and... every... smasher. ... ...Oh, boy."

So, Master started righting letters to every single smasher. I'm too lazy to count, so let's just get to the auditorium where every veteran fighter was sitting.

"Hello again, everyone!" Master said into the mic, "As you all know, we're here to introduce the newcomers. So, get ready for a long and boring session, 'cause it will be."

Groans.

"Of course, you'll be seeing their fighting styles immedialty after." Master continued.

Cheers.

"So, I would like to introduce you to the first batch of newcomers. Please clap your extremly bored hands for Diddy Kong, Funky Kong, Wario, Ashley, Sonic and Shadow!"

Everyone clapped.

"Now, the next bunch: Princess Daisy, Bowser Jr., Meta Knight, the Pokémon Trainer, Solid Snake, Pit, Lucas, Ike, Tyler and Ryxlet!"

Everyone clapped again.

"Okay, get yer butts to the training room!" Crazy yelled.

The room was empty.

"Where'd everyone-" Bowser Jr. started.

"They're already gone to the training room." Master informed, and he, Crazy, and the others also left.

IN DA TRAINING ROOM

When Master, Crazy, and the newcomers arrived, everyone was seated in the stands.

"Okay, newcomers, come with me." Master said, entering a nearby door. the nOObs followed. After a short moment, the new and improved Battlefield appeared on the screen, and Diddy, Funky, Wario, and Ashley appeared there - Diddy appeared in and broke out of a barrel, Funky flew in with his Barrel-flying things, Wario rode his Wario chopper, and Ashley appeared from a dark light.

"Okay, everyone; veterans and newcomers." Master Hand said over the speaker, "We will now demonstrate Diddy's, Funky's, Wario's, and Ashley's fighting styles. We would have used wire frames, but they went on strike to many times... Anyway, GO!!"

And so, they begun. Diddy jumped up on the right platform and kicked Wario. Ashley jumped down to the left platform and shocked Funky with thunder magic. Wario sat on Diddy's face and farted. Funky shot a pineapple from a wooden grenade launcher at Ashley.

Now the battle was really starting! A wooden crate fell down from the sky. Wario picked it up and hurled it a Funky, who dodged it, making it hit Ashley square in the nose. Furiated, Ashley used fire magic and got Wario's pants on fire. Wario, being happy for some reason, turned his back to Funky. He farted again, the power doubled becuase of the flames. A very burnt Funky wiped the soot of his sunglasses and glared at a laughing Diddy. Funky jumped up in the sky and crash landed on Diddy, who stopped his laughing stroke.

A barrel fell down. Ashley broke it opened, and BAM! A Smash Ball! It floated to the top platform. Everyone jumped for it and started attacking it. But, because everyone was so close to each other, the all winded up attacking themselves. They fell to the bottom part of the Battlefield, but only did Diddy get up quick enough for him to break the Smash Ball and obtain its power.

Diddy landed on the bottom part of the stage and looked at everyone. He smirked. Everyone started to back up, only to realise that they were at the edge of the stage.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Diddy cried, a light appearing on his back and in his hands. A small wooden barrel rocket appeared on his back, and two wooden pop guns appeared in his hands. The jet pack started spewing out fire, and Diddy started flying. He was flying all over the stage, continuously shooting peanuts from his wooden guns. Everyone took cover under either a platform or their shield. Eventually, after a while of flying and firing, Diddy's jet pack and pop guns dissapeared, making everyone (but Diddy) relieved.

The brawl continued. Funky activated his barrel blasters and flew over the stage. He landed on the upper platform, only to be greeted by Wario. Wario opened his huge jaw and munched on Funky.

"Yo! Let me out!" Funky hollered at Wario. Wario put on a disgusted look, and spit out Funky.

"Pwa!" Wario continued to spit, "Pwa! Pwa! Taste like monkey! Pwa!"

"No duh!" A wet Funky said.

Diddy stared down Ashley. Ashley stared down Diddy. Diddy suddenly, pounced on Ashley and started pulling her hair.

"Ow! OW! Stupid... MONKEY!!" Ashley flung Diddy off of her and shot an ice beam at him, freezing him into Diddysicle. Ashley continued to shoot purple magic at the helpless monkey. Diddy finally broke free of his cold prison, covered in frost and slightly shivering.

"W-W-What the h-heck does the p-p-purple magic f-f-for?" Diddy asked between his teeth chattering.

"... ...You know, I actually don't know..." Ashley replied. She shrugged, and shot another purple beam at him. Diddy's fur turned purple, and, to his surprise, his damage meter started increasing over time. "Oooooh... Poison..."

"It's not real, right!?" Diddy yelled.

"...Uh, not in the brawl..." Ashley said.

"OH, THANK GOODNESS!" Diddy wiped the sweat off his forehead. Ashley took this time to pick up a recently dropped super scope and shoot at him. Diddy tried to put up his shield, but it was no use; the shots just kept coming and coming. ...Until it ran out, that is. Ashley looked dumbfounded at it, then threw it away.

Another barrel. Funky (now completly dry) cracked it open. What? Another Smash Ball!? Everyone jumped to get it, but it was Ashley who broke it. Its power surging through her, she raised up her hand. Suddenly, Red appeared next to her.

"What!?" Red said, "How'd I get here!?" Then, he turned into a magic wand. Ashley waved the wand over her head, and then, a HUGE man/monkey eating plant rose up from the middel of the stage.

"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!!!" It roared. It reeled its head back and slammed it into the ground, creating a shockwave that made everyone (but Ashley) topple over. Then, two more appeared.

"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!!!" They all roared. They slammed into the other players and caught them in their mouths. They started chewing, chewing, chewing, then they spit them off the stage.

"TIME!!" Master yelled from the room. Diddy, Funky, and Wario appeared back on the Battlefield, but everyone then dissapeared. They reappeared in the little room Master and the others were. The four, plus Master, walked/floated out of the room, "Winner: Ashley!"

Everyone cheered.

"Next, we have Sonic, Shadow, Daisy, and Bowser Jr." Master said, "But that's for next chapter!"

"Stop with the fourth wall breaking!" Crazy yelled. But no one was listening.